Recently I have been questioning how reasonable my expectations are when it comes to everything in my life. For example when dating someone who says they are dating other woman is it reasonable to have an expectation that the 'other women' does not include dating your friends at the same time? Or is that an unreasonable expectation as they are women and as such fall into the 'fair game' category.
Another example, when going out for dinner at a bar there is a general expectation that if they serve food they serve coffee - apparently not - but I digress. Is it an unreasonable expectation to consider a "great place" to be one where it's patrons (in their 50's to 60's) aren't stumbling around drunk, puking on tables, starting fights and smoking pot out back? Or are my expectations of a "great place" just too high for today's society?
I sit here wondering if I have unreasonable expectations. Am I too judgemental? Am I a snob? Or am I just involved in the 'wrong' activities with the 'wrong' people in the wrong 'locations' for me? Am I becoming less tolerant? Or has something changed?
Why should I even care? Because I am no longer enjoying my group activities. Is it because of the change of venue? The change of activity? Or is it my "high" expectations? Regardless of the reason I find myself becoming more despondent with every passing week.
I strongly believe that I should enjoy what I am doing in my free time and if I am not enjoying these activities I should just not do them. I also get that everyone is entitled to their opinions, myself included, as well as their own 'expectations'. I guess what is bothering me is for some reason I have been made to feel as if my expectations are too high when I really believe that I am not be unreasonable at all.
So is my current frustration caused by my lack of ability to 'compromise' my expectations? And if so does that not inherently make my expectations too high? Am I really so 'out of touch' with reality that I am blind to the true nature of people? Do I expect too much?
I don't really have an answer. I guess right now all I can do is stop trying to put a square peg in a round hole. Perhaps I need to lay low for a while.
Peace
I too contemplate my high (as some have told me) expectations when it comes to relationships.
ReplyDeleteI am wondering what the title B.Y.O.B. stands for? I don't feel the common expression fits with your article.
BYOB is a song by System of a Down and it stands for Bring Your Own Bomb. When I wrote this I was thinking I needed to "blow up" my high expectations; however after this was published a few friends reminded me that I was not writing about expectations, I was writing about standards and values. I refuse to compromise my values and if my standards are too high perhaps I need to think about with who/where I keep my company. Cheers!
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