The Song Remains the Same

Have you ever read the instructions on a bottle of shampoo? Here's what mine says "You know the drill: Lather up for moisture you can feel. Repeat if you've got time for another round". I have now been checking out the instructions on shampoo bottles and it would appear that "repeating" is optional on all of them! Hmmm...the things you learn. I was ALWAYS under the impression that it was "Lather, rinse, repeat".

This is how I am feeling these days. First date, grieve, repeat. I would like to skip the grieve and repeat parts, or even the grieve, and just have first date after first date - since I can't seem to keep a guy, but the reality is that's not for me. I have learned that it is very important for me to "grieve" each and every time so I can successfully move on to the next one.

This "grieving" stage for me can run anywhere from a couple of hours to

months depending on how emotionally involved I was. The process for me generally consists of 3 steps - pity/sorrow, anger, acceptance. My pity/ sorry phase consists of 'hibernating'. My anger phase consists of blogging or bitching. My acceptance stage consists of well, NEXT!

Many well meaning people have advised me to stay emotionally unattached - been there, tried that, failed miserably. This is not an option for me. I'm not going to change to appease anyone - male or female. I will only change if my instincts tell me that I need to change. Right now I don't feel the need to be anything other than who I am. I have made all the changes I wish to make at this time.

So I tried to change my behaviours. I stopped online dating. After a few months of not dating at all, men I was meeting in person, started asking me out. I started saying yes. The outcome of these types of dates were far more difficult for me to deal with emotionally because these men were not random strangers, they were men I had been acquainted with for several months.

Now that I have read the instructions on the shampoo bottle it is clear to me - I don't have the time nor the patience for another round, so I DON'T HAVE TO REPEAT! "Won't give you my heart. No one lives there any more." ~ Platinum Blonde

Peace