Always Something There to Remind Me

"I was born to love and I will never be free you'll always be a part of me." ~ Naked Eyes

They say you can't change the past. It seems to me that it is also difficult to forget it. How do you get someone out of your head? Sure, it's easy to forget about someone you never have any contact with. How do you manage this with someone you see on a regular basis?

One of the down sides to having an optimistic outlook is that you almost always see the good in people. Seeing or "remembering" the good is not a good thing when you would rather have no emotional attachment to someone.

For me, one of the hardest things to do is to suppress 'emotional attachment' to people. I have a tendency to care far more than I should, in other words I readily attach to people. For the most part, this is acceptable because there is no risk to me of being hurt emotionally. Once in a while I become emotionally attached to those who will only bring me harm - from an emotional perspective.

Generally, I sense when there is potential for a bad emotional attachment - you know the deal - after interaction you feel exhausted and emotionally drained. When I encounter people that have this effect on me I try to avoid contact all together, or at least limit my contact. Unfortunately, in life there are times when you cannot complete remove the person that is causing the emotional grief.

This is the situation I am currently facing. I once had a positive emotional attachment to this person, which over time became negative. For me this is a very dangerous situation because I only see the 'positive' and forget the 'negative'. Knowing all of this information does not make it any easier for me to stop attaching emotionally.

Sometimes I just want to go with it, enjoy the positive interactions for what they are - moments in time. Other times I just throw up the walls of defense and distance myself by having minimal interaction. I am not sure which path is the correct one. Either choice leaves me emotionally drained which indicates to me that the entire interaction needs to stop...which at this time is not an option. So, I struggle to find the best way to cope.

Peace